Bones: Jumping The Shark Into A Flaming Pile of Razor Blades

I’m someone who has watched “Bones” on TV, on and off, since it started. I don’t have any great love for the series, but it was a suitable filler. For a while.

I recognise that “Bones” runs into the dual problems of 1) trying to remain original given the ground it has already covered and 2) trying to be original among the slew of crime procedural / forensics shows. It’s gone shock and gore to some extent – witness the lingering shots of bodies decomposing, or exploding / bubbling corpses. Every episode is heavily reliant on the magic forensics computer, able to do anything in 30 seconds “once you scan it in”, be it mapping, thread / dirt analysis or whatever needs to be shown to the audience (and said computer is managed by the flakey artist who was originally brought in to sketch faces because she was a friend of the lead character, but is now a magic computer expert).

But even so, there’s a line.

That line was well and truly crossed in “The Crack In The Code”, where the main villain manages to crash the magic forensics computer by carving a virus onto the bones of a victim that was then activated by the computer when it was scanned in. Said bone-carved virus was only obvious to people once the the bone was stained. I’m sure someone said “fractal” at some point as an explanation.

The virus made the computer catch on fire.

This entire joke hinges on "boned" meaning the same thing to you as it does to me. And it may not be funny.

The appropriate response.

I’m not going to say, “I’m never watching ‘Bones’ again!”, because it’s the lead in to “Castle” so I may catch a few minutes of it. But that was certainly the stupidest thing I can remember seeing on what is meant to be a show with a semi-real forensics base.

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3 thoughts on “Bones: Jumping The Shark Into A Flaming Pile of Razor Blades

  1. Pelant is certainly a potential shark jumper for this show. Both ‘Crack in the Code’ and the season finale were terrible since Pelant’s actions are too insanely perfect and powerful to have any believability. Not to mention that they are all impossible in the first place. Apparently Bone’s match is a god who can break all laws of physics and logic.

    • I did catch the back end of the follow-up, where Pelant (if that’s the character’s name) apparently has managed to gain control over all computers in the US through inserting code into library book scanning data. (It didn’t say he controlled all computers, but he was apparently moving money between people’s accounts without them knowing and a host of other things, so let’s just say, “all the computers”.)

      Plus his room in the asylum had a perfect pattern on it that he’s painted using his own saliva, despite the fact that it would have been nearly invisible to him… and no-one has apparently done any accidental cleaning damage to it.

      So yes, to try to put the “Bones” team in some sort of challenge state they’ve made their opponent ridiculous. Booth will have to shoot him (and then look all glum about it) because that character is way too strong to be left alive.

  2. Don’t forget: Hollywood has always maintained that if you spill coffee onto your keyboard, your tower and/or monitor will shoot smoke. Also that “hacking” makes multicolored polygons dance across your screen. 😉

    Hollywood writers are to computing as headless chickens are to quantum physics.

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